Tab 3

My People

Tab 2 was who to call first in an emergency. This tab is broader: who plays what role across your whole life. Four parts, the formal Named Roles and then three rosters. Do them in any order, but Named Roles first makes the rest easier, since some answers carry forward.

The people who hold formal roles in your life. Some legal, some informal but critical. Naming someone here does not create the legal document; it just records who you have named or want to name. The actual documents live in Tab 4.

Important

Before you write anyone’s name in a role below, especially the legal ones, talk to them first. Ask if they are willing. A named role someone did not agree to can create real trouble for your family later. This is the single most important habit in this whole tab.

Durable Power of Attorney (financial)

Makes money decisions on your behalf if you cannot: pays bills, manages accounts, talks to your bank. Durable matters, because a non-durable POA ends if you become incapacitated, which defeats the point.

Name

Relationship

Phone

Backup person and phone

Everyone needs a backup, ideally someone who lives elsewhere.

Legal document status

Where the document is stored

Add this to your Vault Map in Tab 1 as well.

Healthcare Proxy

Makes medical decisions on your behalf if you cannot speak for yourself. This is who the hospital asks for first. Not the same as your Living Will: the proxy is the PERSON, the Living Will is the WISHES. Think about who can handle a hospital room and will honor your wishes even if they personally disagree. That is not always the same person as your first emergency call.

Name

Relationship

Phone

Backup person and phone

Everyone needs a backup, ideally someone who lives elsewhere.

Legal document status

Where the document is stored

Add this to your Vault Map in Tab 1 as well.

HIPAA Authorized Representative

Can access your medical records and speak to doctors on your behalf. This is a separate signed document from the Healthcare Proxy, even though it is often the same person. Without it, even your proxy may struggle to get real-time information from providers.

Name

Relationship

Phone

Backup person and phone

Everyone needs a backup, ideally someone who lives elsewhere.

Legal document status

Where the document is stored

Add this to your Vault Map in Tab 1 as well.

Executor of Will

Administers your estate after you die: pays final bills, files final taxes, distributes what you leave. A real job that can take a year or more. Choose someone organized, willing, and reachable. The most common mistake is naming someone without telling them.

Name

Relationship

Phone

Backup person and phone

Everyone needs a backup, ideally someone who lives elsewhere.

Legal document status

Where the document is stored

Add this to your Vault Map in Tab 1 as well.

Successor Trustee

Only if you have a living trust. If you are not sure whether you have one, you do not: a trust requires a formal signed document, and you would know.

Name

Relationship

Phone

Backup person and phone

Everyone needs a backup, ideally someone who lives elsewhere.

Where the document is stored

Add this to your Vault Map in Tab 1 as well.

Guardian for Pets

Whoever you name here, ask them first. This is the role most likely to catch someone off guard, since pets do not come with warning.

Name

Relationship

Phone

Backup person and phone

Everyone needs a backup, ideally someone who lives elsewhere.

Pets they have agreed to take

“Both dogs”, or “Otis the cat, not the birds”.

Any funding arrangement

Money in the will, a pet trust, or just a verbal ask. Note whatever applies.

Location of pet care info

Food, vet info. Add this to your Vault Map too.

Guardian for Minor Children

Most people at this stage are not a primary caregiver for someone under 18. Some are.

Are you a primary caregiver for a minor?

Digital Executor

Closes your email, social media, subscriptions, and digital accounts after you are gone.

Important

This role is unfamiliar to most people, so it is worth a moment. Your digital executor is often the same person as your regular executor, or a more tech-comfortable family member. They will need access to your password manager, and the master password comes from your Vault Map, never from a written note.

Name

Relationship

Phone

Same person as your executor?

Password manager access documented on your Vault Map?

Before moving on, read down your list. For each role: is the right person named? Do they know? Is there a backup? Is the document signed? Any “not yet” is fine. It is just your next step, not a failure.

Your work saves as you type.